每日小笑话（英语连载）

JaneJian

Joke of Today

We're Not Responsible!

There was a primary school teacher who took her students to see an art gallery. There everyone looked,looked and looked, and one student kept pulling the teacher's dress, saying, "Teacher, Teacher, I think we'd better get out of here quickly."

And the teacher said, "Why is that?" So the student replied,"If we stay here longer, everyone will think that we were the students who did all these paintings."

 

 

 

（以后我会每日发一篇，希望能给大家学习英语的同时，带来愉快的心情）

[此贴子已经被作者于2009-8-5 8:46:19编辑过]

高原狼

good

JaneJian

　　Joke of Today
　　
　　I know who god is!
　　
　　A boy says to her mother, "Mom, is God a man or woman?"
　　
　　The mom thinks a while and says, "Well, son, God is both man and woman."
　　
　　The son is confused, so he asks, "Is God black or white?"
　　
　　The mother replies, "God is both black and white, honey."
　　
　　The son, still curious, says after a while, "Is God gay or straight, mommy?"
　　
　　The mother, getting a little worried, answers, "Son, God is both gay and straight.
　　
　　The son thinks about it, and his face lights up when he thinks hefinally has answered his question: "Is God Michael Jackson?"
　　

JaneJian

　　Joke of Today
　　
　　A Whole Hour
　　
　　Mr. Brown arrived for work an hour late. His clothes were torn and tattered. He was banged and bruised, and he had one arm in a sling. His boss was purple with rage.
　　
　　"It's ten o'clock," screamed the boss, "you were supposed to be hereat nine. What happened?"
　　
　　"I'm sorry," explained Mr. Brown, "I fell out of ten-story window."
　　
　　"That took you a whole hour?"

啊黄

I don't understand all the means

JaneJian

　　Joke of Today
　　
　　slap on face
　　
　　After receiving warnings from his father, a pupil was so worried that he came to school to tell his teacher:"I don't mean to frighten you but my father said somebody would surely get slapped on face if I failed the exam again."

JaneJian

　　Joke of Today
　　
　　Visual Training
　　
　　The squad were having “visual training”. One smart recruit was asked by the officer to count how many men composed a digging party in a distant field.The party was so faraway that the men appeared as mere dots， but unhesitatinglythe recruit replied：
　　
　　“Sixteen men and a sergeant，sir.”
　　
　　“Right；but how do you know there's a sergeant there？”
　　
　　“He's not doing any digging， sir.”

JaneJian

　　Joke of Today
　　
　　Next time that you think you're having a bad day
　　
　　The average cost of rehabilitate one seal after the Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.
　　
　　At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively-saved animals were released into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers.
　　
　　A minute later, a killer whale ate them both.

JaneJian

　　Joke of Today
　　
　　A Present
　　
　　Kate: Mom, do you know what I"m going to give you for your birthday?
　　
　　Mom: No, Honey, what?
　　
　　Kate: A nice teapot.
　　
　　Mom: But I"ve got a nice teapot.
　　
　　Kate: No, you haven"t. I"ve just ｄｒｏｐped it.

JaneJian

　　Joke of Today
　　
　　Diet Tribe
　　
　　Mom was very proud that she'd lost ten pounds. On the way to the store with my husband and me she talked of little else. We ｄｒｏｐped her off in the lingerie department, but when we returned, we couldn't find her. Thinking she might be in the fitting room, I asked the saleswoman if she had seen my mother. "What does she look like?" the clerk asked.
　　
　　My husband said simply, "She just lost ten pounds.
　　
　　"Third door on the left." the woman replied with a smile.

[此贴子已经被作者于2009-8-7 8:34:02编辑过]