四1 abc 刺激反应图和囚
<DIV class=articleContent id=articleBody><P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 75.75pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.43"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 22pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">第四章</SPAN></B> <B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 22pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">快乐密码</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 22pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">4</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 22pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">—定义密码</SPAN></B></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 96.4pt; mso-char-indent-count: 6.0"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">第一节</SPAN></B> <B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US XML:LANG="EN-US">ABC</SPAN></SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">法则，刺激反应图和囚</SPAN></B></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">心理学有个</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">ABC</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">法则，很实用，什么是</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">ABC</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">法则呢？</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">A</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">是指诱发性事件；</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">B</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">是指个体在遇到诱发事件之后相应而生的信念，即他对这一事件的定义和态度；</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">C</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">是指情绪反映。</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"> <WBR></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"> <WBR></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US"><A href="http://blog.photo.sina.com.cn/showpic.html#blogid=5d8000740100bkcd&url=http://static9.photo.sina.com.cn/orignal/5d800074t5c608475d8e8" target=_blank><img src="http://static9.photo.sina.com.cn/bmiddle/5d800074t5c608475d8e8"/></A> <WBR></SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US"> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> A <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> B <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> C</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">通常人们会认为，人的情绪的行为反应是直接由诱发性事件</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">A</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">引起的，即</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">A</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">引起了</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">C</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">ABC</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">理论则指出，诱发性事件</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">A</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">只是引起情绪及行为反应的间接原因，而人们对诱发性事件所持的信念、看法、解释</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">B</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">才是引起人的情绪及行为反应的更直接的原因。</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">例如：两个人一起在街上闲逛，迎面碰到他们的领导，但对方没有与他们招呼，径直走过去了。这两个人中的一个对此是这样想的：</SPAN> <SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">“他可能正在想别的事情，没有注意到我们。即使是看到我们而没理睬，也可能有什么特殊的原因。”而另一个人却可能有不同的想法：“是不是上次顶撞了他一句，他就故意不理我了，下一步可能就要故意找我的岔子了。”</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">两种不同的想法就会导致两种不同的情绪和行为反应。前者可能觉得无所谓，该干什么仍继续干自己的；而后者可能忧心忡忡，以至无法冷静下来干好自己的工作。</SPAN></P><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''; mso-bidi-font-family: ''; mso-font-kerning: 1.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: ZH-CN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA"> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> 从这个简单的例子中可以看出，人的情绪及行为反应与人们对事物的想法、看法有直接关系。在这些想法和看法背后，有着人们</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''; mso-bidi-font-family: ''; mso-font-kerning: 1.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: ZH-CN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">对一类事物的共同看法，这就是信念。</SPAN></SPAN>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">请朋友们再看一下消极被动和积极主动的人遇到刺激事件的区别图表</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US"><A href="http://blog.photo.sina.com.cn/showpic.html#blogid=5d8000740100bkcd&url=http://static13.photo.sina.com.cn/orignal/5d800074t5c6086c6c59c" target=_blank><img src="http://static13.photo.sina.com.cn/bmiddle/5d800074t5c6086c6c59c"/></A> <WBR></SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">那么，我们的信念是怎么形成的呢，主要是五个方面：事件，知识，经验，环境和想象出来的</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">举例，请看第三组图</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US"><A href="http://blog.photo.sina.com.cn/showpic.html#blogid=5d8000740100bkcd&url=http://static10.photo.sina.com.cn/orignal/5d800074t5c6089076ed9" target=_blank><img style="WIDTH: 168px; HEIGHT: 131px" height=159 src="http://static10.photo.sina.com.cn/bmiddle/5d800074t5c6089076ed9" width=198/></A> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR></SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"> <WBR></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">我们每个人都会遇到一些事件，然后形成自己的价值判断—信念，当有人提出新的观念时，一般人会与自己原有的信念进行比较，不一致时，拒绝，认为谁对呢？往往认为是—自己对。</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">同时，自己还不断的为自己的价值判断寻求证据，比如信念是没有好男人，而一旦遇到了一些小的事情，比如身边遇到的男人不守信了，马上又增加了固定自己信念的证据—你看，还是我对吧，果然没有好男人</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">!</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 34.3pt; mso-char-indent-count: 2.45"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">我曾经问一个有这样观点的女学员“请问你接触了几段感情呢”</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">“三段感情，最终都分手了，所以我认为—世界上没有好男人和真的感情。”</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.3pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.95"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">其实，她只接触了三个男人，就把全球至少三十亿的男人给否了。</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">人要改变外面的世界，先要改变内心的世界。要想事情变得更好，先要自己变得更好。</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">所以很多人都活在自己固定信念的圆圈里，人加个框念什么字呢？</SPAN></P>
<P> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.15pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.94"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">答案是—“囚”</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">你会做囚吗？</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><STRONG><SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: normal; FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">不要用别人的错误惩罚自己，比如生气；不要用自己的错误惩罚别人，比如误解；不要用别人的错误惩罚别人，比如打击抱怨；不要用自己的错误惩罚自己，比如自我设限。</SPAN></STRONG></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">你是活在自己的固定信念里呢？还是活在自己的理想中？</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">人与人的区别在于脖子以上，而不在前列腺。</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR></SPAN></SPAN> <SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">决定</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR> <WBR></SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">决定</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 42pt; mso-char-indent-count: 3.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">信念系统</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">------ --------</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">行动</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt" XML:LANG="EN-US">--------------</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">成果</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">你的结果好吗？你快乐吗？现在的人生是你所想要的吗？你不想拥有更加成功幸福的人生吗？</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">如果不是，那么，请从改变思想开始！</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">我常常对学员说：思路决定出路，脑袋决定口袋，格局决定结局，眼界决定世界，企图决定版图，态度决定高度。</SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="TEXT-INDENT: 27.45pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.96"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: ''; mso-hansi-font-family: ''">所以常打破惯性，跳出自己思维的圈子来，亲爱的朋友们，你会获得完全不同的人生。</SPAN></P></DIV>
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